September 22, 2018 RESPECT, COURTESY - ARE THOSE BAD WORDS NOW? by Linda M. Penn I heard recently about a young man, a 5
grader, who was punished at school for saying “yes, Ma’am,” to his
teacher. This incident has been turning over and over in my mind for
several weeks now and I
just had to voice my ideas. I decided to research about the history of
the words, “Ma’am” and “Sir.” “Ma’am” goes back to the 1300’s when it
was the word, “Madame,” meaning a respectful way to address a woman.
“Sir” dates from the 1200’s when the word,”Sire”
was used, meaning a respectful way of addressing a man, especially one
in authority. So…if the words began as forms of
courtesy to others, how did we get to the point of having a student
punished for using the word, “Ma’am?” Not knowing the reasoning or history
of the teacher involved, it is difficult for me to speculate on how this
incident should affect teachers and students going forward. Do
teachers, parents, and any authority figures expect
to be treated with respect or is it old-school to expect courtesy from
our young people? Do students have a conflicting view of how to treat
adults, not knowing if they will respond positively or negatively to the
youngsters’ eagerness to say kind things?
Do others have differing views of “Ma’am?” Yes, I know you might be thinking,
“the lady writing this Blog must be a narrow-minded, old lady.” Go
ahead, think that if you want, but I really appreciated it when a
student said to me, “yes, Ma’am,” during my 25+ years
of public school teaching. The above incident is to me, just
another example, of how common courtesy is slipping away from our
society as a whole. Have we not figured out that kids need respectful
adults after which to model behaviors? I cannot help
but wonder what the young man thinks about trying to use common
courtesy as he grows up. Will he keep following his parents leading and
try to use respectful words to authority figures or will he be hardened
to never use them again? As adults, it seems obvious to me
that we need to do a better job modeling courtesy to our young people if
we want a society that holds each other up, rather than tears each
other down.
Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “Intelligence plus character – that is the goal of true education.” (goodreads.com) The Bible says in Luke 6:31, “Treat others the same way you want them to treat
you.” |